Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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