from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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