Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
as a side note pls kill me
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
