guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
tonight lets celebrate not being married
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
