happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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