I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
