Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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