My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
my poor anus
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
