everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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