My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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