I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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