I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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