Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Randomize