i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
