In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
