I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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