Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
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