I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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