that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
