You work out of a Hotel?
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
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