Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
