Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Randomize
