Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Randomize
