I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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