Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
