let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
