is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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