Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Randomize
