She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize