She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
try to milk me bitch
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