grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize