so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
