Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
