you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
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