I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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