Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Your penis caused this!
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
