You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
