did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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