I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
