I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
