yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize