Tell her she can't have a vagina
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
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