Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
