Its about making memories worth repressing
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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