Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
