Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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