I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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