wrigley field is MILF paradise
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
