Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
