She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
is that a dick in a sweater?
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
